College

       Senior year is about to end, and I still haven’t decided what to do. My parents, teachers and classmates think it’s a good idea to go to college. But I think other wise. April 18 is coming up and that’s when we get to look for our class online. Just think about it gets me nauseous, what do I do? Do I go? Or do I do nothing? To many question but not one answer. I tend to make others think I have it all under control but I don’t. UGGGGGG!!! I just keep saying “I don’t know” “I don’t know.” As a kid I always dreamt of making my parents proud and going to college but I can barely make it to high school. If I keep repeating everything I’m sorry I’m new at this again. I’m confused, I don’t know where to go. I’ve been thinking about working but my sisters say that’s a stupid idea. What do they want from me? They always asked me to work and when I do school has to come first. But what if I don’t want to go to school anymore. What if I gave up my dream just for a job? Maybe I’m just not cut out for anything. Look I’m not trying to make this sad in anyway, but that’s how I feel. Please just tell me what to do. How am I supposed to make it big when I can’t even make it to college, even a classmate of mine asked me if I’m going, I couldn’t answer him quickly all that came out of my mouth was “ mmmmm.” Great just great another person asking me what I want to do when I’m out of high school. You want to know the answer..... I DONT KNOW. How can I explain to you that there’s nothing I would like more than to tell you. ITS FRUSTRATING.